Marbles on Glass
by DarkPhoenixIncarnate
Summary: The Zack and Cody movie ended feeling quite incomplete, so many plot points were left unexplored. So many powerful emotions were utterly ignored. I am working hard to correct this problem. Zack/Cody twincest. Set after the film.
1. Chapter 1

The slow churning of the sea always calmed him, always calmed them both. Even if Zack wouldn't admit it aloud, he knew that it was something they shared in common. It was almost surreal, the way they sighed in unison, watching the stars, hands behind their heads, secluded from the rest of the ship.

If anyone were to catch them up here, he'd point his finger straight at Zack and claim that it was all his fault, that Zack conned him or forced him or blackmailed him into this.

Anything to keep himself out of trouble, to keep himself from admitting that he craved this, that he wanted to be alone with his brother for a little while, that he needed it.

Ever since the Gemini project, it felt like something between them was left unsaid; Cody guessed…no, he _knew _Zack felt it to. Even as the weird fruit wore off, even as they went their separate ways…he felt those unsaid words, lingering between them, making every kiss he shared with Bailey feel awkward and emotionless.

That's what really made him decide to sneak out with Zack tonight, to hide past the measly security and climb atop the deck, higher and higher, through passageways he'd never explored before, recalling how he felt the whole time, how utterly stupid it felt.

After all, he had no idea where he was going and couldn't they just talk in one of their rooms? It was pitch black, naturally considering they were in the middle of the ocean and they conserved power by shutting off unnecessary lights at night but…

The sea churned, waves smashing against the ship, making it rock lightly, making Cody more afraid then he should have been, making him inhale sharply and then curse himself inwardly for showing any sort of fear. But instead of being mocked for it, Zack felt around in the darkness and grabbed Cody's hand, holding it tight. It felt reassuring, _too _reassuring, too warm and comfortable and it shouldn't have calmed him so much because it never did before.

He couldn't help but focus on that warmth, that comfort and he let Zack lead him through the impossibly black darkness, wondering where his brother was leading him, and realizing with dismay that Zack knew exactly where he was going, while Cody was utterly lost. It was just another thing between them that they didn't share.

The sea.

They really were alike in this way, weren't they? They both loved the sea. After a few minutes of being lead through the darkness, Zack had reached up with his free hand and felt around, finding a door knob that lead to a sort of rooftop on the ship.

Which brought him here, to this moment, lying side by side together, arms behind their heads with eyes drawn to the skies.

His logical side was screaming at him, saying this was too dangerous, saying that they could slip and fall onto the deck and break something. Or even worse, fall into the sea and drown together, nobody ever knowing what became of them.

The thought wasn't as terrifying as it should have been…he felt relaxed up here, safe, even when all logic was telling him that, in reality he really wasn't safe and that they should leave _right now. _

Cody glanced over at his brother, who in turn looked back and him and smiled. "This is pretty cool, huh?"

He turned his gaze back to the stars, feeing Zack follow suit. "Yeah…" He felt himself whisper, smiling back, enjoying the cool sea breeze.

It was good. _This _was good, he felt happy and relaxed and Zack gently nudged him before pointing at the stars. "Hey…is that constellation Gemini?"

Cody blinked a few times, and shook his head. He reached out, taking his brother's hand and shifting it. "No, _this _is Gemini."

"…Oh" … " Hey Cody?"

"Hm?"

"What's the story of Gemini?"

At that, Cody blinked and looked over at his brother in disbelief. "…Really? You seriously don't know?" Zack looked over at him, his gaze more serious then Cody had seen it in a while, and he instantly felt guilty for the scrutinizing edge in his voice.

"Nope. You're the smart one, remember?" There was a hint of a smile on his lips, and Cody relaxed a bit.

He took a breath, deciding to simplify the story, not really wanting to tell the whole thing.

"Castor and Pollux…Or Polydeuces, either one really-"

"Polydeuces sounds cooler."

Cody felt himself grin. "Agreed. Anyway…They were twins. But one of them was a god and the other wasn't. One day Castor died-" He felt something catch in his throat at that, it tasted bitter and made his blood run cold. Zack glanced over at him, eyebrow raised, about to ask what was wrong but Cody spoke before he could. "Castor died and Polydeuces, the brother that was immortal, wanting to bring him back to life, shared his immortality with him. But the price they had to pay was to be stuck in the stars forever."

"…So you're saying he gave up his immortality to be with his brother in the sky? Like…_forever_?"

His throat was heavier then it should have been.

"Yup."

"…Oh."

Cody felt his body stiffen a bit, trying to silence his mind, trying not to let his thoughts drift, like they always do. He tried to focus on the churning of the sea, the crashing of the waves against the ship. He closed his eyes, and just as the silence was beginning to get comfortable again, Zack spoke.

"…Hey Cody? …If I die-

"Shut up." He snapped, he didn't mean to snap, worst of all he caught Zack visibly wince in the corner of his eye. He swallowed and licked his dry lips, trying to relax.

"You're not going to die, Zack." And before his brother could say anything Cody continued, not wanting to hear it, not wanting to even _think _about it.

"And besides even if you _did. _Which you _wont. _…I'd just find a way to bring you back."

Zack looked at him, and he couldn't help but look right back, finding a grin on his brother's lips, "Glad you're planning to use those smarts on _something _useful."

He laughed lightly, and felt himself scoot closer to his brother, unable to look away, unable to stop himself from thinking of the future, of the inevitable. He needed to do something, say something, anything to get his mind off of the fact that his brother would, one day definitely d-

"Zack…Why did you _really _try to mess up my internship?"

Zack looked back at the stars, shrugging his shoulders. "Didn't you figure it out during that weird…mind meld…thing?"

He shook his head. "No…I mean, yeah, I guess that was one of your reasons…but there's another one and I couldn't really figure it out at the time but...yeah."

Cody sucked at stuff like this…at least when it came to Zack. With Bailey, it was a different situation entirely…she…she was his _girlfriend _and there's a million advice columns and science articles that tell you exactly how to talk to your girlfriend, the techniques were perfected, down to an _art_.

But how do you talk to your twin? They weren't like 'normal' twins, they weren't. Even when those other twins at the Gemini project got their minds back they were still closer then he and Zack had _ever _been.

They still held hands and hugged and had this unexplainable, natural symmetry between them that he and Zack weren't able to even come close to achieving without having to be under the influence of some weird fruit.

Even after all of it was over, they still felt like the black sheep of the group, they felt awkward around those other twins, all of them with their smiles and joy and relief that they could be different again, that they could be different _together _and not apart.

His mind began shifting again to the twin girls he and Zack saw-

"I'm scared."

Cody felt his eyes widen. "_What?_"

Zack wouldn't look at him. "Think we should've told on them?"

"Who?"

"The twins…Nelly and Kelly…I think. …Should we have told someone what we saw?"

He remembered it far too clearly. They had just had the bad guy sent to jail, the cops having nearly magically poofed in at the perfect time, and instead of just leaving the lab like a _normal _person would, Zack turned and headed in the opposite direction.

"Hey, what the hell are you doing? Bailey and the others are over _that way!_" Cody pointed to emphasize, but he didn't need to, the fruit was still screwing with them and he knew trying to reason with his brother was a lost cause. Zack was after the pretty girl and there was nothing he could do to stop it.

So instead of trying he sighed, tugged on the uncomfortable collar of the jumpsuit and followed Zack through the maze of lab equipment.

"Just what are you planning to tell her when you see her?"

Zack grinned. "Ohhh, nothing special. Just that I'm totally the hero who saved her _and _her sister and she should totally make out with me out of sheer gratitude."

Cody couldn't help but grin as well, and he wondered if it was because of the fruit or if he was just genuinely amused. "Oh? So now _you're _the hero? What ever happened to 'we make a good team…?"

Zack looked back at him and pouted, literally _pouted _and Cody nearly burst into laughter.

"Well, _yeah _we're both the hero but come oooonnn Cody! Give me a break!"

He chuckled lightly despite himself, "Fine. Which way do you think they went?"

Zack shrugged. "Dunno, they seemed to book it out of here pretty fast."

"They might not even be in the lab anymore, Zack."

"Yeah but I didn't see them go towards the exit…"

Almost as if on cue, they heard a gentle thump coming from behind the door directly to their left. They turned their heads at the same time, their thoughts in unison, and Cody wondered to himself if he'd ever actually get used to the idea of his brother in his head.

Zack simply shrugged and said aloud. "How do you think _I _feel? Come on, lets just check to see if it's them or not."

And before Cody could object, Zack gripped the doorknob and pulled it open, glancing inside. Cody's curiosity got the best of him and he looked over his brother's head, leaning against his body and blinking when he spotted them.

The twin girls they had been searching for, hugging each other tightly, clinging to each other like a life line, only to pull away and one of them, Cody couldn't tell which, wiped her sister's eyes. "Shh, don't cry. Are you okay?"

She nodded, chewing her lip, staring worriedly at her sister. "I thought I'd lost you!" Her voice was so choked, so full of emotion that Cody felt his chest clench…or maybe it was Zack's? Either way, it didn't matter. He was sure they _both _felt like they were intruding here, like they weren't supposed to be seeing this moment.

The girls hugged again, one of them whispering reassurances, words Cody couldn't really catch but understood all the same. After another minute, he gently pushed his fingers into his brother's back, telling him telepathically 'Lets go'

Zack agreed, but before they could leave he spotted something, something that made his body go stiff and Cody glanced curiously in the girls direction.

He couldn't believe it.

They…they were _kissing. _

One of the twins, Kelly, maybe, wrapped her arms around her sister, burying a hand in her blonde hair, keeping their lips tightly connected.

They were really kissing, _desperately_. And they didn't stop. Over and over again their lips collided, only pulling apart briefly to catch air, their bodies pressed as tightly against each other as their lips.

It was as if they needed each other to _survive._

In between desperate kisses they whispered, loud enough that Cody could hear, loud enough that he knew Zack could hear, too.  
><em><br>"I love you so much, I thought I lost you. I was so scared."_

"_Shh, don't be scared baby, I'm here. I'll never leave you again."  
><em>

"_I love you, I love you."_

"I love you too, I'm so sorry. I love you too. Don't cry. I'm here. I love you. I love you."

They kissed again, and Cody couldn't stop himself from thinking that he and Bailey never kissed like kisses they shared were always soft, and sweet, and not at all desperate and nowhere near as passionate. They never clung to each other like this, like there was nothing else in the world but them, never whispered such powerful reassurances, never so _sure _of their emotions.

Cody had always thought that such a thing, such emotions were reserved for adults only, that one day, when he was older things like this would just happen, just fall into place. He told himself that at this age he wasn't capable of understanding what love really was.

But these girls, these _twin sisters_ were ..in _love. _Undeniably, desperately in love with each other.

It should've been wrong, should've felt wrong to _both _of them, but it didn't. Zack didn't look at Cody, Cody didn't look at Zack. Instead they watched the girls for another minute before slowly, simultaneously moving away from the door leaving the girls alone, lost in their own world as they made their way out of the lab in silence.

And all of a sudden he was back on the ship with Zack lying next to him, arms behind his head, staring at the Gemini constellation, Cody couldn't bring himself to follow suit.

"No. I don't think we should've told on them."

"…Me neither. …It seemed…"

"…Right?"

Zack nodded, closing his eyes, feeling the churning sea. "Yeah, it seemed right."

The silence resumed, and there was a question on Cody's mind that he wouldn't dare to ask, no matter how much it itched at his skull.

Zack spoke again, his voice hushed, as if not wanting to be heard. "…Think…Think we'll ever be like that?"

The question was stolen right from Cody's head, and his eyes widened, his body automatically sat up, looking down at his brother disbelievingly. "_What?_"

Zack's eyes shot open wide and he sat up, too, waving his arms left and right palms up as if trying to dispel the words from the air.

"No no! Not like _that! _I-I mean…You know, like…_normal _twins who're all, _close _and …stuff."

More waves crashed and roared against the ship, their thundering unable to drown out the pounding of his pulse. Cody felt himself flush and shudder and he blamed the strong winds, the chilling sea breeze. He licked his dry lips, trying to avoid looking at his brother's face but unable to.

"I…I don't know…I mean…I think a connection like that builds up over the span of many years, Zack…and it's not like we were ever…it's not like we…"

And suddenly Zack's lips were against his, the weight of his brother's body making him nearly fall onto his back again, and at first, he couldn't move. His eyes were so wide he thought they might pop out, something in his stomach jumped and it shocked him just how much willpower it took for him to pull away from the kiss.

"W-What the _hell _Zack!"

His brother winced, and witnessing the simple action made his chest _ache._

"…I…I want to be."

_"What? _Zack, you better start talking some sense or I _swear_-"

Zack groaned in annoyance, tugging lightly on his hair. His brow furrowed…he was frustrated, Cody realized. _Extremely_frustrated, and he'd only seen Zack wear this look maybe three or four times in their lives together.

He looked him in the eyes and Cody found it difficult to breathe.

"I want to be that close, okay? I want to be close with you, I wanna have that stupid twin thing, I wanna wear the same clothes and accidentally say the same things at the same time and we'll never have that chance now that you're going off to fucking YALE and leaving me behind to rot here and do _whatever. That's _why I tried to fuck up your internship and your plans with Bailey. I just wanted to spend Spring Break with you, okay? It's the last chance we're ever gonna have to be kids and be free and just be able to spend _time _together. There, are you happy now? I said it! Mystery solved! Now we can go back to treating each other like shit and you can go off to your stupid university and get married and have kids and have a job and completely forget about your retarded brainless twin brother you left back home."

It took at least a minute for all that to sink in.

All the new information swirled around in his head, making it ache, making Cody look at his brother, really _look _at him for what might've been the first time ever.

Everything was starting to come together, and it was all so easy, all so _obvious _that he couldn't believe he never caught it before.

"Wh…Why didn't you ever tell me this?"

Zack actually threw his head back and laughed, but it wasn't joyous at all and Cody _hated _the sound, hated the way it made his throat feel constricted, his body numb.

"Like you'd ever actually _listen _to me. You're always so busy lost in your own world that you don't even-" Zack got quiet for a second, before shaking his head and letting out a breath.

"Just…forget I said anything, ok? It was stupid." Zack lies back onto the cool steel, this time he keeps his eyes tightly shut, biting at his bottom lip, as if trying to erase all that he revealed.

Cody's mind was still reeling, still trying to process all the information, thousands of actions blurring together and finally making sense and suddenly he has so many questions.

He didn't even realize he said it until after the words left him,

"But…why did you _kiss _me…?"

The reply is almost instantiations, as if Zack had been expecting the question this whole time.

"Isn't it _obvious_? You know for such a smart ass you seriously can't take a hint."

But…it made no sense…right? He replays memories over and over in his mind, girls Zack has dated, girls Zack has chased, girls Zack has stared at in the nudie magazines he's managed to somehow get his hands on.

"B…But you've dated and gone after _countless __**girls**_!"

Zack groans at that and shifts, squeezing his eyes shut even tighter, the strain evident on his features. "But that's _different! _I don't want…I mean…they don't really matt-…_Ugh! Just forget it!"_

And it all started making sense. Everything from lies and excuses, to smiles that seemed just too fake for comfort to actions that Cody could've sworn were just for attention, and the most importantly; Words. The things Zack said, from the little hints slipped inside their daily dialogue to literally pointing it out.

Zack wanted it. Wanted to be like those twin girls they saw and Cody wonders just how those two started. Were they once like he and Zack were?

Did they fight? Live utterly different lives until one day, everything just changed? Or had they been like that forever? Connected, in love, _constantly _since the day they were born…

It seemed like something out of a stupid romance novel, it seemed too improbable to really happen in reality but…he had _seen _it. The passion, the desperation…the undeniable _love _between them. It wasn't hormones, it wasn't a phase, it was real _love _and his brother just admitted to him that he wanted the same thing, and despite all his shortcomings all he had been trying to do was convey that to him, to say it without really saying it, trying save himself the pain of rejection.

Suddenly Cody's own words rang harsh and loud in his head '_You may be my twin…but you're __**not**__ my brother.' 'I hate you' 'Why are you __**here**__?' _and countless other cruelly selfish insults that his brother just stood there and took all the while craving, wanting, inwardly begging for something else, something more.

He thought of the twin girls, of their love, and he looked at his brother, looked at his tense form, watched his eyes strain to stay closed, seeing complete fear in every detail of his skin.

He thinks of the kiss, of the kind of courage Zack had to have had to try it, of how he'll be leaving for college after graduation, away from his brother for who knows how long.

It was just _now_ occurring to him, and meanwhile Zack must've been thinking about it for weeks, hell, months.

…Maybe _years_.

And suddenly Cody feels his body move without any real consent from his conscious mind, suddenly he's leaning over his brother and slowly, slowly moving down, trying to ignore how wrong this all is, trying to ignore how guilty he feels for not noticing any of this sooner.

Zack seems to feel his presence, and he opens his eyes, only to stare right into Cody's, and the look he gives him screams too much of fear, of hesitation, of wantand_ hunger_.

He speaks, and Cody feels his throat beginning to tighten. "Cody…What're you doing?"

He doesn't know, he wants to say, he doesn't know, he's just young, and confused and this is just a phase and those girls we saw were just going through a phase, too. We can never be that close, no matter how much you want it, no matter how much I want it. We will never be like them, we'll never be 'real' twins, will we?

And he doesn't want to believe it, he wants to take a page from his brother's book for once, wants to scream 'fuck logic! Isn't it worth _trying_? Especially after all you've been through trying to hide it from me? You're my brother for fuck's sake! I can't just say no without…without….

Cody licks his lips, the wind picking up, the cold making him instinctively want to lean closer into the warmth below him. He takes a deep breath, tastes the salt on his tongue and manages to speak.

"…L-…Look, I'm just…I'm gonna try it, ok? I…I at least owe you that and…and if it doesn't…uhm…"

Zack fills in the blanks for Cody like real twins would do, like those twin sisters most likely do.

"Feel right?"

"…Yeah. Then…Then we can just pretend it never happened…deal?"

"Y-Yeah…Deal."

His brother's face is flushing red now, and his breathing is starting to get shallow and Cody leans in closer, feeling his own face flush, feeling his heart pound harder then it ever did when he tried to kiss Bailey.

Their lips are almost touching, and he hesitates, just for a second. Zack's body is absolutely still, and Cody isn't sure he's breathing anymore and he knows, he just _knows_ that his brother is scared and not for the reasons he should be.

They kissed.

And at first? It's slow, and odd to Cody how well their lips fit together.

Not like Bailey's, her lips were always so big, so overpowering that it felt like she'd swallow his mouth if he wasn't careful.

At first, he's the one doing all the kissing, Zack just lay there, frozen in fear, his body seemingly paralyzed and Cody should've pulled away then, he knew. But this wasn't right, he wanted to really _try _and just letting it end like this would leave it so half assed, so unfinished and he couldn't stand leaving things unfinished.

He pressed a bit harder, trying to get Zack to relax, gently putting a hand on his shoulder as if to calm him and the simple action does wonders. Suddenly his brother's hand is in his hair, gently, very gently, pressing their lips closer.

Suddenly, one testing kiss becomes two, and then three, and Cody's making up excuses in his mind as to why the last kiss wasn't good enough to count, there wasn't enough involvement on both parts, that angle was all wrong. If he was going to try it he was going to do it _properly _no matter how many times it took.

Three kisses became four, then five and suddenly he found himself fully on top of his brother, pressing his lips harder and harder against Zack's own, shuddering when Zack thrusts his tongue into his mouth and tastes him, delves into him, unravels him.

Suddenly the excuses die down in his mind, and for the first time since he can remember he stops thinking just loses himself in the sensation, in the rising heat between their bodies.

He's lost count of their kisses now, each one becoming more raw, more savage, all opened mouthed and biting and tongues wrapping against each other, fighting each other, the simple _taste _being enough to overload his senses.

He feels Zack's hands sliding up his night shirt but he doesn't do anything to stop it, instead he arches towards those hands, shudders at how they know just exactly how to touch, exactly how hard to press.

Not like Bailey, not like her feather light fingertips toying with his skin, making him want to laugh at their ticklish gentleness. No, this wasn't anything like Bailey, this was Zack and he knew, he just _knew _what felt right.

He _knew, _like real twins would know, like those sisters most likely know.

And it suddenly occurred to Cody that this was considered cheating, he was cheating on his girlfriend…with his _brother. _The thought made his stomach lurch and he forced himself to pull away, feeling breathless, feeling his lower body throbbing.

All of a sudden the few inches of distance between them seemed to stretch for miles, and it shocked him to realize that he didn't want to stop, that he wanted to lean back down and taste those lips again, he wanted to feel them fit together perfectly, as if they were always meant to.

He tried to force the thoughts from his mind, he took Zack's hand and pulled it out from his shirt, trying to steady his breathing, trying to look anywhere but his brother's wide, rejected eyes.

"We…We can't do this."

And it should end there, Zack should silently agree and they should leave and never talk about this again and that would be it. Maybe they could go the rest of their lives ignoring that it ever happened, that either of them ever wanted it.

But Zack was too stubborn for that. He sat up and gripped Cody's shoulders, forcing him to make eye contact. His glare was harsh, scrutinizing and it penetrated Cody's defenses more then he ever thought possible.

"Why not?" Zack's nails were digging into his shoulders lightly, and he should've pulled away from the grip, but he didn't, he didn't move, he didn't look away. He searched his brain for the most cold and logical answer he could think of.

He only hesitated for a split second, but he was sure his brother caught it.

"Because…I don't want to, ok? I tried it, I don't like it. It's sick, and it's wrong and we're just being overly hormonal teenagers. …Now, we had a deal remember? Lets get the hell out of he-" Zack's hand was over his mouth now, silencing him. Cody watched his brother take a few deep breaths, trying to calm himself, trying to fight away his anger and frustration but it was so painfully evident in his voice.

"_Don't _lie to me, ok? I _know _when you're lying. Admit it, you want this too. You want it, and you're just trying to pretend you don't, you're trying to pretend that it feels wrong but it _doesn_'_t_."

He slowly moves his hand away from his brother's mouth and lets out a shaky breath, as if trying to hold back tears. "It doesn't feel wrong…It feels _right_. Just…can't you admit I'm right? For _once_?"

Cody feels himself shift, feels his throat become heavy and his lips burn and he did want it, he wanted it more then he wanted anything else, more than he ever wanted Bailey, more than he wanted Yale and Zack was right but he didn't…he couldn't…

"…I'm scared, Zack."

Zack leans foreword then, and Cody twitches but doesn't move, he holds his breath as his brother presses his forehead to his own and whispers to him,

"_Shh, It's okay baby. Don't be scared…I'm here._"

And he recognizes those words, he remembers the twin girls, the lovers who said them, and suddenly he finds his lips on his brother's again, their kisses quickly becoming powerful, _desperate. _

More so then they were before, this time he feels Zack gently push him onto his back and he doesn't protest, instead he buries his fingers in his brother's hair and forces their lips closer.

He gives in to the furious _want _tugging at his chest, making his body tremble, making every kiss they shared more heated, more intense and Zack's hand was sliding up Cody's shirt again and instead of pulling away like he knew he should, he arched foreword, pressing his body against that hand, shuddering at how such a simple touch was making his entire body seemingly flush.

It was good, _too_ good and it almost scared him how natural this felt. He feels his own hands cling to Zack's shirt, tugging on it, suddenly hating the distance it created between him and his brother's skin. The fabric is hot and it makes his hands burn and he pulls away from the kiss, panting like crazy and whispering to his brother "Take this _off!" _

The shirt comes off barely a second after he says it, Zack throws it over his head, off of their little roof, maybe off of the ship itself but he doesn't seem to care. Instead he tugs lightly on his brothers shirt, and Cody doesn't say no, doesn't fight back. He arches off of the hard metal surface and helps Zack remove the cloth from his skin.

He throws that, too, and Cody finds that he really doesn't _care _anymore, instead he only moans as his brother's lips are suddenly on his neck, pressing firm kisses to his skin, pressing him back against the cold metal of the ship, making him wrap his arms around his brother's impossibly warm chest for heat.

Cody never thinks to tell his brother to stop, to be careful, to not suck and bite at his neck so firmly, so passionately. He never thinks that later he'll have to hide those marks, instead he arches his neck, baring more of his skin, silently begging Zack to do it, to bite him, mark him, as if it'll make up for lost time.

As if it'll make up for his own ignorance. Zack's lips find his again and the kiss is so inflamed with emotion that Cody wondered how the hell he ever missed it before. How could he have been so blind to it all?

He kissed back with desperation, lapping at his brother's tongue, pressing their bodies together, as if trying to apologize for never noticing, for never looking, for always thinking Zack was so one-dimensional, that he couldn't be hiding anything under those pranks and stupid grins.

He was a shitty brother, a shitty _twin _and he hated himself for it.

They were moving faster now, their bare chests pressed together, Zack's lips against his own as his hips arched foreword into his brother's, making his heart jolt in his chest, making them both shudder almost simultaneously.

Cody feels himself moan into his brother's mouth, feels the waves crashing against the ship and the finely coarse texture of Zack's hair between his fingers. Their bodies start moving faster, hips arching foreword and kisses becoming more sloppy, more inflamed.

The wind picks up around them, howling in their ears as Zack slow grinds his hips into Cody's, and by all means Zack shouldn't be able to hear him over the wind when he moans out, "_Oh god, do that __**again.**_" But he does, he hears it and grinds their hips together, his tongue trailing along Cody's collar bone, up his neck and to his ear where Zack whispers to him to just let go, to stop holding back.

They find a steady rhythm a second later.

He digs his nails into his brothers back, feeling himself arch foreword, hearing himself moan as he wraps a leg around his Zack's waist, trying to bring their hips closer, trying to increase the friction between their bodies.

Zack's lips are against his ear, his pants and moans making Cody outright shudderand nuzzle his brother's cheek, moaning right back, crying out his brother's name as Zack slams his hips foreword, picking up the pace between them.

Sweat forms on his skin, quickly wiped away by the howling winds, he tastes salt on his lips and arches his head back against the uncomfortable steel, moaning without restriction, too lost in the overwhelming ecstasy to feel ashamed.

His entire body is burning and flushing and he knew Zack had to be feeling the same thing because he moans right back, moans out Cody's name and speeds up the pace, presses their hips closer together, catching his lips in a kiss that could only be described as _bruising. _

The friction is utter torture, he feels his muscles clench, his erection throbbing under his pajama pants and Zack's body is hot against his own, the taste of his lips utterly addicting as pressure builds in his lower belly. He moans out his brothers name, tugging at his hair, feeling his head thrash back and forth as their grinding becomes erratic until suddenly-

Suddenly he's crying out into the night air, Zack's face buried into his neck as he moans back, screams back, Cody knows he releases first, but Zack is right behind him and gripping onto him as if he were drowning and Cody's body was the only thing keeping him from drowning in an unfathomable darkness.

They arrive in front of Zack's room, both of them completely shirtless and it made Cody feel vulnerable, naked in a more ways then he could have imagined. He's grateful for the dimmed hall lights that hide the flush on his face.

He's grateful for the warm hand in his own, squeezing it tight.

Then he realizes then that they've been holding hands all the way back from their secluded rooftop, and by all means he knows he should feel ashamed, dirty, guilty...

Instead he looks at his brother's bedroom door, knowing there was nothing inside stopping him from entering. No roommate, no prying eyes. Zack must be thinking the same thing because he tightens his grip on his brother's hand, before releasing it as if telling him to make his own choice.

As if it were that simple.

They stared at the door in silence, and Cody wished he knew what his brother was thinking. …Was he regretting what they did? Reliving it in his mind? Did he want to ask Cody to come in? …Was he still afraid?

So many questions, too many and just as he was about to draw up the willpower to ask they heard voices coming from down the hall. Cody froze, eyes widening, fear beginning to grip him. What if they were caught like this? Together at who knows what time, shirtless with obviously drying stains on their pajama pants…

"What're you _doing_? Get in here!"

He was snapped out of his thoughts, having not noticed Zack opening the door, eyes wide as he gestured Cody inside, but he couldn't will himself to move, at least not fast enough for Zack. His brother's hand was suddenly clasped tightly around his own again, and he was tugged roughly into the bedroom. Zack used his free hand to quietly, gently shut the door as the voices increased in volume.

They didn't breathe for a full 30 seconds, instead they kept their hands clasped tight as the voices passed their door and moved down the hallway, seemingly taking forever to fade into the distance. Once they did however, they unclasped hands and took a deep breath, almost in unison, almost.

The silence between them resumed, and Cody wondered if they had been closer, if they spent more time together…would he know what to say? Would he feel more ashamed of their actions if he ever truly thought of his brother as just that…a _brother_?

There were too many regrets weighing on him now, too much to think about, too many actions to analyze. With a sigh he made his way over to the vacant bed, he needed time to think, time to sleep and he lay down on the naked mattress, shifting uncomfortably.

"…Cody, what the _hell _are you doing?"

"Going to bed, what does it look like? I'm not gonna risk going back to my room _now._"

The silence resumed then, and Cody let both his eyes close, he put an arm under his head as a makeshift pillow, and just as he was about to fall into a pained, awkward sleep, he was being forced up by the wrist.

He didn't have time to protest, all at once he was flung into Zack's bed, his brother's hand gripping his wrist firmly, keeping him in place as he lay beside him. Cody's eyes were wide open now, his breathing hitched and his heart suddenly hammering at their close proximity. Hell, their noses were almost _touching. _

Words escaped him as he stared into his brother's eyes, his throat suddenly heavy and Zack's hand leaving his wrist, about to pull away completely before Cody took it in his own. An impulse, he supposed, but he twined his fingers through his brother's own and it felt right all the same.

A comfortable silence settled between them, drowsiness slithering it's way into their bodies, and in that tired haze, Cody felt himself speak.

"Zack?"

His twin blinked tiredly, licking his lips. "Hm"

Cody had to ask this now, while his brother's defenses were down, blurred by exhaustion.

"How long have you felt this way about…me, about…us?"

Zack's eyes opened at that, slowly, eyelids still heavy. Their hands were still clasped together, and Cody squeezed lightly, trying to reassure him that it was alright…that he didn't hate him for this.

"…I dunno…" He hesitated for a beat, taking a breath "…Forever, I guess."

Cody felt his heart clench at that, every limb of his body suddenly feeling heavy, his throat as well, weighted down by some massive, invisible force. He squeezes his brother's hand tightly, trying to pour as much affection into the action as possible.  
>He tried very hard to make sure he voice doesn't crack. "I…I'm sorry I didn't notice."<p>

And Zack only shrugs, forcing himself to be nonchalant. "It's too late now."

"Why?" Why is it always too late?

"You have a girlfriend, remember?"

The realization hits him, along with a strange sense of disappointment, and then guilt. When did he start thinking of Bailey as a nuisance? As something that held him back? He was in _love _with her…Right?

He swallows again, trying to push those thoughts back. Maybe he'd feel differently in the morning. "…You have a girlfriend, too." And it was as if he just noticed it, really noticed it.

"Yup. Maya."

Cody's chest feels heavy again. "I…I guess it is too late."

Zack squeezes his hand, and their eyes meet in the darkness, their noses brushing against each other lightly. And Zack whispers to him; "I'd break up with her. If you wanted to…I mean, I'd break up with her in a second."

"…But don't you like her?"

Their hands are clasped so tightly now that Cody feels his wrist beginning to get sore, but he only holds on tighter, his breathing far too shallow.

Zack's voice comes out in a small whisper, as if he wanted more then anything to stay silent and never reveal anything to his brother ever again.

"I'd leave her for you."

And Cody tried not to think about how much that really meant. About how long Zack had gone after Maya, after all he went through to stay with her, that he'd drop her in a second for a relationship that wouldn't…that wasn't…that _couldn't…_

He feels himself scoot closer to his brother, their legs lightly touching. Without even thinking about it he presses a light kiss to his brother's nose and touches his forehead against his twin's.

"Goodnight, Zack."

"Night, Cody."

-End of chapter one-


	2. Chapter 2

Authors Note: Uh...Holy crap! Hello everyone! DarkPhoenixIncarnate here! I just wanted to say...wow! Thank you all so much for your reviews, for your favs and watches! To be honest I didn't think this fic would get much love at all but I'm so happy and flattered that it did, and that a-lot of you enjoy it! Originally I had planned to make this a giant one shot, but after I realized I had written 17 pages (aka the first chapter) and noticed that I was nowhere near done I realized I'd have to make it a multichapter. This is my first one in a while, so your support really matters and it really inspires me to write more! Thanks so much! I hope you enjoy chapter two!

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><p>It was odd, waking up in Zack's room. Odd mostly because it felt too natural, too right, as though he was waking up in his own room, his own bed. Cody felt warm, comfortable, safe. Feelings he had never really associated with his brother. He glanced around the room quickly finding that he was alone, finding that he felt oddly relieved, and dismayed at that fact.<p>

Slowly he forced his body up, the cool sea breeze drifting in through the small open cabin window was calming, refreshing, and chilling against his bare chest Cody looked down at himself then, at the dried stain marring the crotch of his once clean pajama pants. He shook his head, forcing back the images of last night, forcing back the flush spreading across his cheeks. Instead he just poked the crusted fabric and huffed lightly. "Unsanitary."

He pulled himself out of Zack's bed, away from the warmth and comfort, heading for the bathroom, craving a shower. Zack wouldn't mind...right? After all Zack was the one who invited (well, more like forced) Cody into his room last night so he shouldn't- He suddenly lets out a frustrated groan, running a hand through his hair. How pathetic could he get? Here he was, wondering if his twin brother would mind him taking a _shower _in his room of all things.

The thoughts are pushed aside as Cody turns the shower faucet and steps into the shower, not bothering to wait for the water to heat up. He jumped mildly at the cold spray hitting his skin, too lost in thought to really do anything about it, though. ...When did it become so awkward between them? ...Was it always like this?

Cody closed his eyes, pressing his forehead to the off white shower wall, letting the slowly heating water soak his hair, his scalp beginning to tingle as he tried to think. Tried to go back, back to when they were kids, from before the ship, before the hotel. ...Were they ever close like twins were supposed to be?

He had always thought that the so called 'twin bond' was such a cliché, just because they were born at the same time didn't mean they _had _to be close. To them, well, to Cody at least, being twins had just meant he had a sibling with an identical genetic signature.

There never was a connection between them...was there? No. They never had a 'twin thing' Cody never finished Zack's sentences, Zack never cried when Cody fell down. They didn't have a secret twin language, they couldn't read each others mind with a simple glance, and they certainly didn't know each other.

Cody let out a deep, elongated sigh, forcing himself to pull away from the shower wall and dutifully pour rub shampoo into his hair. He was such a terrible brother, a terrible _twin. _They shouldn't have needed a fruit to have a connection. It should've just _been _there.

He should've known, should've realized why his brother was making his life hell. Part of him had to have known it wasn't simply just Zack being Zack...right? But try as he might, he couldn't recall the idea ever really crossing his mind. Only after eating the fruit did he even consider that his brother actually had layers to his personality.

And even then Zack admitted to him last night that he had still hidden things from his brother. An emotional connection, a mental connection, to the point where they were hearing each others _thoughts _and it wasn't even enough for Cody to realize-

God dammit, god _dammit._ He hated not knowing things, hated feeling like an idiot. He could name all 118 elements on the periodic table including their atomic number, but damn it all if he understood one thing about his twin.

How long had his brother felt this way about him? How fucking long? Could it really have been forever? His skin felt tight, heavy, as if it were covered with a layer of grime that he just couldn't get off and he rubbed at it, almost violently with Zack's bar of soap. He should've noticed, he should've known, he didn't want Zack to have to tell him. He wished he had figured it out for himself, it was obvious, it was so obvious. ...At least, it _should have _been.

And Cody wasn't an idiot, he knew it wasn't just his fault, he knew Zack had purposely hidden things from him...That must've been why he was so reluctant to continue the experiment, to establish the emotional connection. Since when was Zack the twin with more emotional depth?

...Since when did Zack feel he needed to hide anything from him?

Frustration rose within him, and Cody needed a distraction, he needed to stop thinking about this. There was nothing he could do about the past, he needed to accept that. He needed to accept that he had lived alongside someone for 18 years and knew absolutely nothing about him, nothing that really _mattered. _

He forced himself out of the spray of water, shutting it off with an almost violent turn of the knob. In the steam clouded bathroom he blindly reached for a towel, only to groan when he felt none. Great. With a sigh he stepped out of the shower, succumbing to his fate of having to be nude in his brother's room. Oh well, at least there wasn't a roommate he had to worry about.

Peaking his head out of the bathroom, he glanced around the room. ...Empty. "Zack...?" He called out, just to be sure.

No response.

Cody shivered lightly at the rush of sea breeze that met his wet skin, and for a moment the warmth and safety of Zack's bed was far too appealing. It was Saturday. No class today, no need to rush. If he really wanted he could jump back into bed, wrap his body in the covers and wait for his brother to come back.  
>Just <em>how <em>would Zack react to that, he wondered. Coming back into the room only to find his brother, someone he admitted to harboring _feelings_ for, nude and shivering in his bed...? Would he...Would they...?

Cody felt his ears burn and he turned away from the bed, chewing on his upper lip. "Stop it," He muttered to himself, taking a deep breath to calm himself. "Stop it Cody. Get dressed." And then it occurred to him, he was in _Zack_'s room. With a groan he pulled open the top drawer of his brother's dresser, and blinked in surprise when he found his brother's clothes organized...incredibly well organized.

Huh, he never pegged his Zack as the type. He began searching through the top drawer, finding only socks and underwear. A light smile came to his lips. Underwear on the left, socks on the right, just like his own top drawer.

Maybe they were more alike then he thought? If that was the case then the next drawer should... He pulled it open and felt himself laugh a bit. "I knew it." He mumbled, feeling a grin come to his lips, tank tops to the left, t-shirts in the middle, long sleeve on the right.

He knew before he opened the bottom drawer that the shorts would be on the left, and the pants on the right. And though he already guessed it, something warm gripped his chest when his theory was confirmed. He had found something. A 'twin' thing. Something they both did unconsciously, identically And although their clothing style was different, they still had it, they still had something in common.

Cody grinned wider, selecting clothes that were the most suited to his style, wanting to hurry and get dressed, hurry and find Zack and tell him.

He left the room in a rush, feeling far too comfortable in his brother's clothes, feeling a sort of euphoria as he walked past people, smiling at them, greeting the perfect strangers with a sort of swing in his step.

They had something that make them alike, something that was strictly theirs. The elevator chimed and he was suddenly on deck, a gust of warm sea breeze soothing his nerves, making him smile, making him inhale the scent deeply. God he loved the sea, loved hearing the sound of the ship cutting through the waves, the gentle roar so soothing.

His eyes scanned the deck for his brother, and he could've sworn his heart leapt right into his throat when he spotted Zack laid back against a lounge chair, bathing in the warm rays of the sun, seemingly enjoying the sea breeze just as much as he was. "Zack!" He called out, unable to help the grin that came to his lips when his brother lifted his head, took off his sunglasses, and smiled at him.

Cody was sitting on the lounge chair beside his brother's a few seconds later, he felt far too hyper, too excited to share his find, wanting to see how Zack would react, already enjoying the little smile on his brother's lips and realizing that smile was for him, and him alone. He felt himself smiling back, "Zack, guess what?" His brother raised an eyebrow, sitting up looking amused at Cody's obvious enthusiasm.

"What's up?"

"We-"

"Cody~!"

The sound of Bailey's voice was loud, unexpected, and Cody unintentionally winced at the interruption. Zack just rolled his eyes and lay back against the lounge chair, watching as Bailey made her appearance in front of them, her shadow blocking the warm rays of the sun, and the scent of her perfume so potent that it overpowered the sea breeze.

Cody smiled at her, trying his very best to resist the urge to recoil away from her and her powerful perfume. What, had she used the entire bottle? "Good morning Bailey." He smiled politely at her, and If she was aware of how strong her perfume was, she didn't show it, instead she sat herself beside him and wrapped her arms around his neck, pressing a quick kiss to his lips.

Zack looked away, putting his sunglasses back on.

"Good morning! Where've you been? I went to your room this morning to ask you to breakfast and you weren't..." She suddenly trailed off, and Cody looked at her, confused. "Bailey? What's wrong?" In an instant her gaze had gone from something like love and adoration, to what seemed like a severe animosity. "Cody Martian..." She began, and oh god, she used his full name, this couldn't be good.

Zack was looking back over at both of them now, eyebrows raised.

Suddenly she gripped his, no Zack's shirt and tugged at the collar, harshly, the fabric almost ripping. "Is that a _hickey _on your neck?" Cody felt his eyes go wide..._What_? His hand flew to his neck and there he felt it, the light bump of irritated skin. Oh god, oh god, Zack had left a fucking _hickey?_

"Are you _cheating _on me, Cody Martin?" Bailey's voice was rapidly rising in volume as well as pitch and it drew people's attention. He swallowed, his throat feeling heavy and he screamed at himself to just say something, _anything. _The first thing that came to his mind was what flew out of his mouth and thank _god _it wasn't the truth. "A-A hickey? O-Of course not! It's just a bug bite!"

Bailey was standing now with her hands on her hips, and her eyes narrowed in a _violent _glare. "A _bug bite? _We're in the middle of the _ocean!_"

….Dammit. She was right, and he was an idiot. He should've known she wouldn't buy a lie that stupid, damn his inability to lie! He was busted, so busted and there was no way out and his silence wasn't helping any. Cody knew he should say something to her, _anything _but he couldn't speak, he could barely breathe and all he could think was that oh god, she was going to kill him. She was going to utterly _slaughter _him. "_Cody Martin you cheating son of a-"_

"Oi! Bailey!" The sound of his brother's voice, so very calm, so nonchalant made Cody swallow a lump in his throat. What, was Zack _trying_ to make it worse? Bailey whipped her head in his brother's direction, glaring down at him, as if challenging him to give her a reason to invoke her wrath upon him as well. "_What _Zack?"

He didn't seem intimidated. "Weren't _you _the one who dragged him around a forest all week?"

"_So!" _Her voice had reached a new level of shrill, and Cody did everything in his power to keep from wincing in obvious dislike at the sound. His entire body was stiff, was he even breathing anymore?

Zack just pulled off his sunglasses and rolled his eyes, like her anger was absolutely nothing.

"_So..._I'm pretty sure there's a shit ton of bugs in the forest, Bailey. You know, ones that _bite._"

At that, Bailey became utterly silent and Cody could've kissed him. He could've taken Zack in his arms and kissed him right then and there. However the moment was broken when Bailey re-clenched her fists and re-directed her glare at Zack, who challenged it easily, obviously beginning to feel frustrated with the situation.

"I _know _what bug bites look like, Zack! I grew up on a farm! That is _definitely _not a bug bite! So _butt out_ this is none of your god damn business!"

And suddenly Zack was sitting up, eyes fixed to Bailey's form, glaring at her with enough malice to make her recoil slightly. "It's my business when you start accusing _my brother _of being a cheater. Do you _honestly _think that Cody would cheat on you? Seriously _think _about it for a second, are you absolutely positive that it's a hickey and not a bug bite? Or are you just being an annoying drama queen again?"

"_EXCUS-"_

With a roll of his eyes Zack stood from the lounge chair and gripped Bailey's shoulders, forcing her body to turn and face Cody. He leaned in close to her, speaking directly into her ear. "Instead of jumping to conclusions, why don't you just fucking _ask _him? You _know _he can't lie for shit."

Cody felt tension begin rising in his neck as he was suddenly thrust into the spotlight again. His nerves were being pushed to their limit and the fact that a little crowd had gathered around them didn't help him any. Bailey huffed and forcibly removed Zack's hands from her shoulders, before crossing her arms over her chest and glaring down at him, her gaze all distrust and anger.

"Cody Martin, did you cheat on me? Is that really a hickey on your neck?"

He felt himself swallow twice, wishing a worm hole would just suddenly appear and take him the hell away from here, regardless of how unlikely that scenario would be considering they were on a moving craft and the idea of a wormhole going unnoticed long enough for it to reach Earth's atmosphere was simply preposterous and-

Cody noticed Zack from behind Bailey, gesturing at him with wide eyes to hurry the hell up before he dug himself into a deeper hole and suddenly he was back in reality with a very, very angry girlfriend who was aggressively waiting for an answer.

Taking a breath, Cody forced himself to stand, trying to ignore the pounding of his pulse in his ears, trying to ignore the whispers of the crowd around them. He placed his hands on Bailey's shoulders, looking her in the eyes and hoping that just this once he could lie properly. "I didn't cheat on you Bailey...It really _is _a bug bite."

His girlfriend stared at him skeptically for a few seconds, before she slowly uncrossed her arms, her shoulders starting to slack and the aggression leaving face. "...You swear?"

Cody felt himself nod firmly, trying to look believable, his throat feeling heavy as he speaks. "I swear."  
>And all of a sudden she's in his arms, having thrown herself at him. Meanwhile the small crowd around them bursts into cheers an applause as if this is some horribly written television drama. She presses her lips to his, and the action is fleeting and lackluster. "I'm sorry I doubted you." She whispered to him, hugging him tightly.<p>

Cody wraps his arms around her tightly, trying to force himself to put some affection into the action, trying to reaffirm to himself that yes, he does care about this girl..and then he catches a view of his brother who's staring at him, and suddenly it's as if Bailey doesn't exist anymore.

He stares straight past her, at his brother who smiles at him an empty, jealous smile. And Cody wants more then anything to let go of the girl in his arms, to reach out and grab Zack, to shake him and ask him why, why would you help me if it was only going to hurt you? Why would you do that to yourself?

But Zack doesn't seem to hear his silent screams, he doesn't say anything, only puts on his sunglasses and makes his way through the small crowd, out of Cody's sight, leaving him feeling utterly alone while surrounded by a group of people, while in his girlfriend's arms

–

The door to Zack's bedroom slams closed behind him, and he doesn't mean for it to. The ship is rocking harder then he had felt it in a while, according to their captain they were passing through a storm system and by all means, Cody should still be with his girlfriend.

Especially after the earlier scare he had with her, the last thing he should be doing is leaving her side at night. But he couldn't help it, ever since Zack looked at him like that...

He never wanted to see that look on his brother's face again, that bitter jealousy seeping into his features. But at the same time...he was almost grateful for the look. Grateful because his brother showed it to him instead of hiding it.

He wanted Zack to show him how he was feeling, he wanted Zack to be honest because he always thought he knew when his brother was lying, but he was wrong. When did his brother become so damn good at lying? It was disturbing to think that Zack could've been lying to him for their whole lives and he had been none the wiser. So much for getting the brains in the family.

"You gonna say something or are you just gonna stand there and stare at the wall?"

Zack's voice pulled him from his thoughts and he blinked a few times, his eyes feeling dry. God, how long had he just stood there and stared? He turned his gaze towards Zack, who was laying on his stomach in bed, on the side Cody had slept on last night with the pillow Cody had used under his chest as he read comic books.

Was it all on purpose? Was Zack laying on that side of the bed, with that pillow trying to imagine Cody's body in it's place? Trying to catch the lingering scent of his skin against the sheets? No longer was it a question of 'how long' Zack had wanted it. Now it was more of 'how much'; ...how much _does_ he want it?

He shook his head, pushing those thoughts aside. That could wait, first thing's first. The ship rocked hard and Cody gripped the doorknob behind him to keep himself steady. He watched his brother intently. "Why did you help me earlier?"

Zack raised an eyebrow and stared at him silently for a full 30 seconds before huffing and looking down at his comic book. "You're welcome." The sheer disdain in his tone made something in Cody's chest jolt and he pulled away from the door, trying to keep his balance as he moved towards the bed. "T-Thats not...I mean, I'm grateful! I really am...you saved my ass."

His brother doesn't look up from the comic book, and Cody feels the overwhelming urge to grab it and throw the damn thing out the cabin window. "Zack, will you at least _look-_Ah!"

The ship rocks violently, his entire body is thrown foreword and just as he braces himself for a collision with the ground, he feels his brother grip his arm and pull him into the bed. His body lands on a fluffy mattress, face pressed against Zack's sheets, mouth open and full of fabric. He pulls himself up and sputters, spitting dryly and muttering a "Bleh!"

Zack just rolls his eyes and looks back at the comic, as if he was completely indifferent to the fact that his brother was in bed with him. "You're so damn clumsy. How have you not broken every bone in your body yet?" His tone is cold, emotionless, and Cody feels his frustration rising at it.

No. No way in hell was he going to let Zack go back into his little shell, he wasn't going to let Zack get away with lying to him and pretending he didn't care anymore. Cody gripped his brother's shoulder and turned him around, forcing him on his back and before Zack could protest Cody was on top of him, hands clutching Zack's wrists and keeping them pinned to the bed.

His brother's eyes go wide and he struggles against the grip, but the attempt is half-hearted and more for show then anything else because Cody _knows _Zack is physically stronger then him. He knows his brother could shove him off if he wanted. Instead Zack just turns his head to the side, trying to hide the flush on his cheeks.

Cody feels his heart hammer in his chest, and he wants Zack to _look _at him, to face him and face this, he wasn't going to let his brother hide it from him anymore. Not when it was so obviously weighing on his mind. "What. I _meant _was...Why did you help me? I tho-"

Zack cuts him off then, his gaze firmly set to his right as he attempts to mask his voice with a thick veil of indifference. "Because you're an idiot who can't lie for shit, now _drop it._"

Cody glares down his brother, his frustration growing again, his nails digging into his brother's wrists as the ship continued to rock against the waves. He wanted to shut him up, wanted to block out those utter _lies _spilling from his Zack's lips. He spoke directly from the heart, his chest aching, pulse throbbing at their close proximity, and his boldness.

"Will you just cut the bullshit Zack? Stop pretending you're so damn indifferent to everything because you're not! I _know _you're not." His head is aching along with his chest now, and he takes a deep breath, trying to calm himself down, trying to focus on the roar of the waves, audible through the cabin window, knowing that Zack was just trying to protect himself. He had always been trying to protect himself and he didn't...he never...Cody presses his forehead to Zack's and closes his eyes, soothed by the feel of warm skin against his own. "I just wish I had noticed it sooner."

His twin is quiet for a moment, and Cody is almost afraid to open his eyes, almost afraid to look, but he can't help it. Curiosity gets the better of him just in time to see his brother tilt his head up and press a feather light kiss to his lips. He feels a flush come to his cheeks, his lips tingling, and Zack speaks, his voice hushed and serious and Cody's heard that tone more in these last two days then he had in their entire eighteen years of life together.

"I helped because you needed me to help. You're my brother and you needed me. Plus..." Now it's Zack's turn to flush, and Cody feels himself fall in love with the subtle tint of red rising on his brother's cheeks. "Plus it's my fault you have that hickey in the first place."

"Yeah but..." His mouth feels dry, throat constricted, still he manages to speak. "Don't you want...I mean, I thought you wanted-"

Zack shakes his head before he can finish, his eyes locked with Cody's own, that subtle flush slowly growing darker. "Yeah, I do want it. But..._you _don't." And the way Zack says it, so nonchalantly, as if he had already given up makes Cody's chest ache, and he leans down, pressing a firm kiss to his brother's lips..

He feels his twin's body clench beneath him, having not expected the kiss, but he responds to it immediately. Zack rips his hand from Cody's grip and buries it into his brother's hair, forcing their lips together even harder, pressing his entire body up into the kiss, pouring everything he had into the action. And Cody is nearly reeling from the intensity of it all, he feels himself press his body back, and it was astounding to him how natural this was, how warm and inviting his brother's body felt.

They pull away from each other, both breathless, and Cody realizes with a surprising amount of dismay that their breathing isn't in unison. "I don't..." his throat feels heavy as he tries to catch his breath, tries to calm his pounding pulse. He presses his forehead against Zack's again and closes his eyes, focusing on breathing. "I never said that I don't want it, Zack. ...I just said that I was scared."

He hears his brother inhale sharply, then stop breathing all together and he opens his eyes, looking down at Zack who's staring right back with an emotion that Cody can't quite place, but understands it's intensity all the same. It's painfully obvious how hard Zack is trying to hold back the excitement, the _hope_ in his voice. "...Seriously?"

Cody finds himself feeling a strong sense of clarity wash over him as he realizes how much emotion his brother is investing in this, and that what he says and does right here, right now, will shape their relationship for possibly be the rest of their lives.

The question is..._does _he really want this? Logically he knows that it can't last, but that knowledge doesn't stop him from being curious, from craving it. He stared down at his brother and realizes that in these last 24 hours he had felt closer to his twin then he had in _years_and that he liked it. He liked that closeness, liked seeing a side of Zack that he'd never really knew existed. And he had only seen the bare minimum so far, hadn't he?

Last night Zack asked them if they'd ever be close, like real twins should be, like the twin sisters they saw so passionately in love. Zack wanted it, and there was no denying that Cody wanted it, too. He wanted to be that close, he wanted to wear the same clothes and say the same things, too. He wanted to know when his brother was hurt, wanted to feel pain when his brother pricked his finger, wanted to feel sorrow when his brother wanted to cry. He wanted to know what Zack was thinking from a simple look, from a gentle touch.

"...Zack." He begins, his voice much steadier then he thought it would be, "I want it, too. But...I really _am _scared. There's so many variables..."

His twin just shrugs at him, nods at him and says. "I get it, Cody. I know you wanna go to Yale and I know you like whatsherface. Look, we have a little over a month left before we graduate, right? Lets just...try it. And after we graduate, if you don't...I mean, it'll be okay, you know? I wont hate you for not wanting it. The fact that you're willing to even try is like..." He trails off there, swallowing a bit and forcing himself to keep his gaze steady, to not look away. "It means a lot." He shakes his head a bit, swallowing again, "So uh, deal?"

And Cody can't help but lean down again, moving in closer until their lips are just _barely _brushing against one another. So close, _so close _and he wants it, he _wants _it. He wants to press his lips against his twin's, wants to feel them fit together perfectly, wants to try it, wants to know who his brother really is, wants to taste it and enjoy it and revel in it and it didn't matter what anyone thought. He has so many questions for his brother, so much he wants to explore, so much he wants to revel about himself.

But first thing's first.

Cody feels a grin come to his lips as he whispers, "Deal." and closes the distance between them.

-End of chapter two-


End file.
